Bordom Blogging

It's amusing to me that there are so many people who make their lives out of blogging, making music, and creating art on the internet. The net has made it easy for everyone to access a public medium that they can broadcast any message they want on. The amusing part, in case you missed it, is that there are many people who do this who are called introverts because they're anti-social.

Music has been a huge thing lately. The band finally got together, with the addition of one Steven Shoop, and we have our crew together. Songs have been written and worked on. The issue I find within myself is that there really isn't much I want to express to the world (except for my frustrations about not knowing what to say). I feel like saying things to the public in any manner is rude. Who wants to hear about what I feel or what I want or what I did? My answer is no one, or they would have asked.

But this contradicts everything I feel about music. Music is fun to play and write but when I write there isn't anything that needs to be expressed, or when tried to express the words cannot be formed. I just don't understand...

Things have been very frustrating though. We played live the other day for a group of friends and things fell apart. It scared me because things were getting frustrating and now theres a grab for control and i think it might create rifts between us.

I'm feeling very anxious about writing this, I think because I'm being honest to a group of people who may or may not ever read this. I'm also watching something on tv and its making me feel very nervous and anxious. Paused and now things feel a little better.

Anyway, everyone is jumping in to fix what they think is a problem and it seems that everyones "problem" is that someone else doesn't sound right. I suppose its just natural instinct to assume that you're right and that something else is wrong, but its important in a group setting to look at everything.

Collaboration is a tricky trade to get down. Especially if people are not that willing to let one of their ideas go because it doesn't help as much as someone else's. Some people's egos just get in the way, myself not excluded. It's just... scary that this might be the start of the end for what we've been working on